Today’s news:

Bank bozo

Bank bozo

A 36-year-old man was arrested Monday for trying to knock over two Bay Parkway banks with a foul-mouthed laden demand note.

Police said that Denis Ryjenko entered a Chase Bank at 6701 Bay Parkway at 3:42 p.m. and stormed up to the teller passing her a poorly written run on sentence reading “You bitch fast now $10,000 grand or start shooting bitch don’t f--k with me no f--king explosive with unmarked bills fast now $10,000.”

When the teller balked, Ryjenko grabbed the note and ran off, only to appear at another Chase Bank, this one located at 8418 Bay Parkway with the same note.

Cops alerted to the first robbery were diverted with the second, where they charged Ryjenko with multiple counts of attempted robbery, attempted grand larceny, attempted petit larceny, menacing and harassment.

All muscle, no brains

A vitamin store thief used every muscle but his brain when he erroneously left his fingerprint on a bottle of energy supplements during a recent heist in Bensonhurst.

Police said that the suspect, identified as 18-year-old Genah Pasternak, entered the GNC store on 18th Avenue near 71st Street back on June 4, 2009 and hit a worker with a deluge of questions about the merchandise.

As he did so, he picked up the bottle of energy supplements and referred to it, officials said.

But before he could conclude his tirade he muscled the employee into a back room and demanded the combination to the safe.

The crafty clerk gave Pasternak the wrong combination and the 18-year-old left empty handed.

Cops caught up with Pasternak last week after the fingerprint lifted was finally matched to the 18-year-old, who was charged with robbery.

Driven to a cell

A pair of car thieves were behind bars last week after they were found working on a 1999 Pontiac parked in Sheepshead Bay.

Police said that Greg Talyzin, 28, and Nikita Zavarzin, 24, were seen pulling up to a driveway on East 28th Street between V and W in a black Impala.

Talyzin exited the car and approached the Pontiac that was parked in the driveway and forced open the door.

He was allegedly seen rooting through the cabin for a few minutes before he ran back to join Zavarzin, reportedly taking a portable GPS device and a Blue Tooth ear piece, which he apparently dropped during the escape.

Cops picked up the duo a short time later, charging them with criminal possession of burglar’s tools, criminal mischief and criminal possession of stolen property.

Robbed of iPhone

Cops are looking for the two thugs who grabbed a woman by the neck and robbed her of her cell phone in Sheepshead Bay.

the victim told police that she was nearing the corner of East 23rd Street and Avenue Z just after 6 p.m. on February 24 when the two suspects, both in their late teens, grabbed the woman from behind.

They reportedly throttled the woman until she relinquished control of her cell phone, which was in her hand, police said.

Anyone with information regarding these thieves are urged to come forward. Calls can be made to the 61st Precinct at (718) 627-6611. All calls will be kept confidential.

Raising the roof

Thieves tunneled their way through the top of the Bay Quick Mart, 1511 Voorhies Avenue, recently, taking thousands of dollars in cash, cigarettes and phone cards.

Employees told police that they closed up shop at 11 p.m. on February 21. When they returned at 8:30 a.m. the next morning, they discovered that someone had torn a hole in the roof.

Whoever did so repelled down and removed $1,000 from a locked drawer and $400 from the register, as well as cigarettes and phone cards. A DVR was also taken, officials said.

Grandmother arrested in child’s death

The grandmother of the 11-year-old boy who died in a Coney Island apartment blaze was arrested last week for leaving the child home alone when the fire was set.

Officials said that hours after a fire ripped through her apartment on West 24th Street near Surf Avenue on February 16, Melinda McLain found herself in custody, charged with reckless endangerment and endangering the welfare of a child.

Investigators determined that McLain had left her grandchild Tavon Turpin alone in the apartment when the fire was set. It’s believed that Turpin was playing with matches when the fire started.

Turpin died in the blaze. McLain, who reportedly returned as firefighters were putting out the fire, was so overcome with grief that she had to be taken to an area hospital for evaluation.

Locker looter busted

Police have slapped handcuffs on a locker looter who allegedly preyed on customers at Bally’s Fitness on Sheepshead Bay Road.

Officials said that 31-year-old Wilson Tamay was taken into custody at about 6 p.m. on February 17 when he was allegedly seen entering the men’s locker room inside the gym near Shore Parkway.

When a worker noticed that Tamay didn’t leave the locker room after a few minutes, the police were called.

Responding officers reportedly found a mesh bag on Tamay containing a number of stolen items taken from members lockers, according to prosecutors.

Tamay was charged with criminal possession of stolen property and other crimes.

Killed in deli dispute

A 25-year-old man was gunned down in Coney Island following a dispute in a Mermaid Avenue deli, officials said.

Police said that the victim, identified as Adam James, was inside the deli near West 32nd Street just before midnight on February 15 when sources said he was confronted by someone he had an earlier argument with.

After a fierce exchange of words, James left the deli and approached his car.

Once he got inside, his opponent pulled a gun and opened fire, pumping upwards of five shots into the vehicle.

James reportedly got out of the car and fell to the ground, witnesses told police. He died at the scene.

The gunman fled, said police, who are asking anyone with information regarding the man’s whereabouts to come forward.

Calls can be made to the NYPD CrimeStoppers hotline at (800) 577-TIPS. All calls will be kept confidential.

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