Today’s news:

More pain at hospital

78th Precinct

Park Slope

Hospital pain

Some creep stole a man’s wallet out of a bathroom in the Methodist Hospital on Sixth Street on Sept. 21.

The victim told cops that he was doing his business at the hospital, which is located between Seventh and Eighth avenues, at 8 pm when he left the wallet in the can. He returned three hours later to find the wallet gone, and $200 figurately flushed down the toilet.

Silent snatch

A gentle goon stole a woman’s wallet out of her purse on 14th Street on Sept. 24.

The victim told cops that she withdrew money at her bank, which is between Fifth and Sixth avenues, at 11 am. When she got home almost 12 hours later, she noticed that her pocketbook was missing and several purchases had been made by the perp.

Birthday bummer

It’s his party, but his dad will cry if he wants to after some guest stole his wallet on Sept. 23.

The victim told cops that he hosted the birthday party inside his Fourth Street apartment — and the billfold was still on hand when the festivities began at 11 am.

But two days later, the birthday boy found the wallet sitting in front of the apartment, which is between Fifth and Sixth avenues, with the debit cards laid next to it. More than $200 had already been charged to the cards.

Fast crimes

A perp stole a woman’s wallet out of a classroom in JHS51 on Fifth Avenue on Sept. 23.

The victim told police that she left her wallet in an unlocked classroom in the school, which is between Fifth and Sixth avenues, at 3 pm while she was working.

At 5:15 pm, she noticed that wallet, which contained $40 and credit cards, was missing.

Car thefts

• A thief stole a Toyota 4-Runner from Second Street on Sept. 23. The victim told cops that he left his off-road vehicle between Prospect Park West and Eighth Avenue at about 11 am and returned a half-hour later.

• A high-rolling robber stole a Lexus from its Sterling Place parking spot overnight on Sept. 23. The victim told police that he left the luxury car between Fifth an Sixth avenues at 5 pm, but it was gone when he returned at 6:30 the next morning.

— Joe Anuta

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