Today’s news:

Robbery at the Farmer’s Market!

78th Precinct

Park Slope

Free-range

Some jerk stole $3,000 from the Ronny Brook Farm booth at the Grand Army Plaza Farmer’s Market on Oct. 16.

The victim told cops he put all the cash earned for the day into a bag at 2 pm, but left it out in the open. Fifteen minutes later, all the dairy’s dough was missing.

Need insurance?

A perp stole $1,000 worth of electronics out of a Metlife insurance company car parked on Fifth Avenue on Oct. 14.

The victim told police he parked the Jeep between First and Second streets at 12:30 pm, but when he returned 45 minutes later, he noticed the items missing.

He’s probably insured.

Hospital hurt

Some jerk stole a woman’s purse out of a locker inside Methodist Hospital on Oct. 11.

In the latest crime to occur inside the Sixth Street medical center, the victim told police that she put the purse inside a locker in the physical therapy office, which is located between Seventh and Eight avenues, at 10:45 am.

Half an hour later, the locker was empty.

Transit trick

A sneaky creep stole an iPhone right out of the hands of a straphanger at the Union Street stop of the R train on Oct. 9.

The victim told cops that the train pulled into the station at about 9:40 pm, and as soon as the doors opened, a man standing on the platform grabbed the phone and fled.

Mac malodor

A strong-armed thug stole a Macbook laptop out of a car parked on First Street on Oct. 11.

The victim told cops he parked his car between Fourth and Fifth avenues at 3 pm and returned 12 hours later to find the back window of his car smashed and the laptop missing.

Garage opener

Some jerks broke into a Sixth Avenue garage and gershed nearly $5,000 worth of bikes and equipment on Oct. 14.

The victim said he locked the garage, which is near Prospect Place, at 11 pm, but by 8 am the next morning, the lock had been snipped and the bikes and parts were missing.

Bejeweled bandit

A bling-hungry burglar stole $4,300 worth of jewelry out of a Seventh Street apartment on Oct. 15.

The victim said he left the apartment, which is between Fourth and Fifth avenues, at 4 pm. An hour later, he returned to find that the perps had taken his valuables and fled.

Side swipe

A thief stole the side mirrors off of a Mercedes Benz on Eighth Street overnight on Oct. 14.

The victim told police that he parked his car between Seventh and Eighth avenues late, but returned at 7 am the next morning to find severed wires dangling from where his mirrors used to be.

— Joe Anuta

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