Today’s news:

Two Canarsie stores burglarized

Commercial conundrum

Two Canarsie businesses were looted last week, both on Jan. 16.

Workers at the Country Butcher, which is on Avenue L near E. 93rd Street, told police that they closed for business Sunday evening, but sometime after midnight someone forced open the front door and jimmied the safe, taking $1,500.

At roughly the same time, someone forced the back door to a laundromat on Seaview Avenue near E. 95th Street, taking $600. The thieves had to raise a metal gate to get at the door, investigators noted.

Anyone with information regarding these two heists is urged to contact the 69th Precinct at (718) 257-6215. All calls will be kept confidential.

Drive-by dunces

Two thugs were arrested on attempted murder charges in connection with a Jan. 14 drive-by on E. 85th Street.

Police said that the two suspects, age 26 and 29, drove by the victim’s vehicle while it was between Farragut and Glenwood roads at 5:40 pm and opened fire, striking the car repeatedly. Their target wasn’t harmed.

Investigators identified and apprehended the gunmen this week, police said.

In the dumps

A dump truck driver with a suspended license was arrested on Jan. 13 after he slammed his rig into a 2002 Nissan Maxima and then tried to flee the scene.

Witnesses told police that the 2005 Mac dump truck slammed into the Nissan Maxima at the corner of Remsen and Flatlands avenues at 8:13 am.

The driver of the Nissan Maxima was found laying on the ground outside the car, suffering from a broken pelvis, dislocated hip, multipe fractures, and cuts to his knees and forehead.

The 45-year-old truck driver ran off — but didn’t get far — cops apprehended him a few blocks away, finding the keys to the truck in his pocket.

Store raid

Thugs held up a Flatbush Avenue store on Jan. 10, but were unable to open the safe.

Workers at the store, which is near Avenue M, said the suspects entered the store at 11 am, pulled a gun and then went behind the counter, where they emptied the register.

They then tried to open the safe, but left after they couldn’t budge the door.

Caught in the act

A thief busted his way into an Avenue I home on Jan. 13, but made a hasty retreat as soon as he was discovered.

The 17-year-old resident told police that she was inside the home, which is near E. 40th Street, at 1:30 pm when the thief kicked in the front door.

But when he realized she was watching him, he ran, escaping in a white van.

Clothes hog

A clothing diva was arrested on Jan. 11 when he was caught stealing $1,310 worth of garments from a Kings Plaza store.

Cops apprehended the thief after store security guards thwarted the 3:08 pm theft.

Opening rush

A trio of thieves jumped a Flatbush Avenue tattoo parlor employee just moments after he opened the store on Jan. 16.

The employee said he was raising the gates to his business, which is near Avenue N, at 2:05 pm when the goons attacked, leaving him with a deep cut that needed medical attention.

The thieves ran off with the victim’s wallet and tattoo license.

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