Today’s news:

Mr. Thief’s wild ride

Pocketbook carnage

A thief caught rummaging through a car parked on Quentin Road on Jan. 14 ended up crashing his own car during a harried police chase.

Witnesses reportedly spotted the 34-year-old thief break into a 2008 Audi while it sat parked between E. 21st and E. 22nd streets at 9:15 am, but didn’t report it until 12:30 pm.

Cops later spotted the thief in the area in a different car and gave chase. The thief sped the wrong way down a one-way street and slammed into a fence during his botched escape attempt.

Villainous vandalism

Biased hooligans attacked a 2011 BMW parked on E. 13th Street on Jan. 13, swiping the side view mirrors, splashing the rear window with black paint and scratching a swastika in the hood.

The 40-year-old owner of the luxury car said he parked his vehicle between Avenues S and T at 10:15 pm. When he returned to it at 7:30 am the following morning, the vandals had already left their fear-filled message.

Compu-swipe

A thief turned in a broken laptop for a working one on Jan. 14 during a visit to a computer repair shop on Avenue U.

Workers at the business, which is between E. 18th and E. 19th streets, said the thief entered the store at 5:45 pm, dropped off the broken computer, and plucked a working one from a display case as he headed toward the door.

Nabbed in car

A 20-year-old thief was arrested on Jan. 14 after he was caught rifling through a car parked in an E. 14th Street garage.

Cops found the thief looting through the cabin of the car at 7 am as it sat parked in the garade, which is between Kings Highway and Avenue R.

Wallet whisk

A thief entered a Quentin Road store on Jan. 16 — only to run off with an employee’s wallet.

Workers at the store, which is between Kings Highway and Coney Island Avenue, said that the wallet, as well as $300 and some credit cards, was taken off a table sometime before 1 pm.

Pint-sized Picassos

Two graffiti vandals, the youngest 15, the oldest 17, were arrested on Jan. 15 when they were caught leaving their tags at the corner of Brigham Street and Avenue U.

Cops apprehended the two teens at 2:35 am, finding pens, nine cans of spray paint and a marker on them.

Rolled away

Tire thieves were rolling around the area last week. Here’s what happened:

• Thieves swiped the tires and rims off a 2010 Honda Accord parked on E. 17th Street on Jan. 14 — leaving the brand new car on cinder blocks.

The car’s 27-year-old owner said she parked the vehicle between Avenues S and T and later found that the wheels were removed sometime during the night.

• Four tires were removed from a 2011 Honda parked on E. 12th Street on Jan. 9.

Thieves had plenty of time to raid the car — its 70-year-old owner said that it was parked between Kings Highway and Avenue R for six days before the theft had been discovered.

• Goons removed two tires and rims from a 2010 Nissan Maxima parked on E. 12th Street on Jan. 15.

As in the earlier theft, the car was parked between Kings Highway and Avenue R when the thief swiped its wheels, leaving one side of it resting on a cinder block.

• The owner of a 2010 Nissan Maxima returned to his car, which was parked at the corner of Avenue S and E. 16th Street, on Jan. 15, only to find that two tires were missing.

The 28-year-old owner told police that the car had only been parked for seven hours before he found it teetering to one side.

Gym rat

A thief broke into a 29-year-old woman’s car on E. 10th Street on Jan. 8, rifling through the cabin.

The victim said she left her 2004 Infiniti parked between Kings Highway and Avenue R at 2 pm when someone broke the front window, taking $400 and some credit cards.

Lexus loot

A goon broke into a 2010 Lexus left on E. Eighth Street on Jan. 7, taking some credit cards, $500 and a checkbook.

The thief smashed the window to the car as it sat parked between Avenue P and Quentin Road sometime between 4 and 6:30 pm, the victim told police.

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